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Hello, my name is Kristopher Sandoval, Wiki Content Manager. I handle most of the next-gen releases and currently have over 122 wikis under my supervision. When not editing wikis and browbeating CSS into doing what I asked it to do, I also make music, game on vintage consoles, and teach art. I am primarily a PC gamer, but I also game on the PS3 when I have the chance.
I first started my foray into the world of technology as a child. I built my first machine for the sole purpose of running Space Ace at more than 10 fps, and from there, my obsession spiraled out of control. My teen years were split between humanitarian work and exploration of the technical age. By age 13, my humanitarian work was recognized by the United States Air Force, earning me a commendation as Youth of the Year, and by age 14 I was awarded Eagle Scout. At 15, I began showing my art in various showcases around the Sacramento, CA area, and by age 17, I was enrolled in an Academy for the Arts. I now spend my time playing video games, writing music, and coding websites. Go figure.
Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.
Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round. I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world. Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.
When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes." This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.
There can be only one.
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